'Extinct or Alive: Jaws of Alaska' isn't accurate, but it does make me think (too much) about sharks

Sharks have always freaked me out. As a kid (definitely *not* as an adult), I had an irrational fear that a shark was going to swim up on me in any body of water. Good thing that never happened, right?

I had never heard of Forrest Galente before watching his Alaska special of Extinct or Alive. His show got two seasons on Animal Plant. Before that, he was actually on Naked and Afraid as a contestant and did "well" per the show's standards.

There's been a few seals that are missing half their bodies... Probably the last three years or so, a Valdez fisherman told Forrest when he and his crew came up to film in 2020. The third clip used in Jaws in Alaska (literally less than 10 seconds in) shows this, it's pretty gory. Dunk came home while I was watching and gave me this face – ☹️ accurate.

Forrest "specializes" in endangered species. If you're wondering why there are air quotes it’s because he isn't actually a zoologist, so specialties mean nothing. He has a degree in biology and touts himself as a wildlife biologist (per his IG bio), but having a bio degree does not make a conservationist.

People have very strong opinions about him, which I understand (and agree with). He is known for parachuting into communities and claiming work from real wildlife biologists as his own. Some of his "findings" on the show were not what they seemed, to put it simply. Branden Holmes broke down (5,000+ words worth) just how problematic he is.

Another valid concern from critics is the facts he shares are usually wrong. Quite literally, the *first* numeral fact he says in his Alaska special is incorrect. He claims there are more than 1,000 species of sharks worldwide. This is not true, NOAA says there are 500+.

I'll give you a real sleeper shark fact – they are the oldest living animal on earth with a backbone. True story.

I found an old quote from Lee Hulbert with Alaska Department of Fish and Game (2005) that described both sharks better than I could.

Salmon sharks will kick your ass. Sleeper sharks are like big tubs of goo. It’s hard to tell if they’re dead or not.

Forrest and his crew first investigate the oh so illusive sleeper shark. He claims they can be over 20 feet long (true, although average length is 12 feet) and weigh up to 8,000 pounds. This is not true, average weight is 700-800 pounds. He tells viewers they are deep water sharks (correct) and can go to 6,000 feet below surface (close but not quite: depths of 6,500+ feet have been reported).

They first see the sleeper shark while looking through 80+ hours of footage (allegedly). They check hooks every four hours; after eight days, they catch her (again, this is all according to him. I can't fact check these numbers nearly as easily).

ADD PHOTO

Look at her. That striking, deep charcoal color – like some sort of beautiful nightmare.

Forrest measures her at 9 feet, 10 inches long, and ties her to the boat before tagging her so she doesn’t hurt herself. Data from her tag showed she stayed deep and far away from any mammal populations.

Over the last decade, Alaska biologists have questioned whether salmon sharks have played a role in salmon population declines (they're called salmon sharks for a reason).

Salmon sharks are cousins to the great white shark. Forrest said they can grow up to 14 feet. This is not true, Alaska Fish and Game says up to 10 feet (literally what is wrong with this dude lol). Salmon sharks are endothermic, which he correctly identifies. Salmon sharks can regulate their body temp = salmon sharks go nrrooooom. Forrest says the U.S. Navy has clocked them going 50 miles per hour (true).

There is a pretty quick shot of Forrest on the boat looking for salmon sharks with a local wearing a hoodie that reads "Alaska Shark live expedition." Looking that up led me to North 60 Adventures, a company out of Valdez specializing in moon jellyfish night dives, salmon shark snorkeling and sleeper shark diving tours.

How convenient!!

After no luck, Forrest breaks out the electric surfboard again to get closer to the shark. They eventually locate him, get back in the water and are able to tag him.

Data sent back to Forrest's team said that as the weather cooled, the salmon shark traveled offshore away from marine mammal colonies.

At the end of the special, Forrest throws out a theory that it could be a secret third thing in the water.

I think that due to the shifting sea surface temperatures and the moving of marine resources, there's a new apex predator in town. A shark unexpected, and unusual to Alaskan waters: the great white shark. And there's only one way to find out, to come back and search for that animal right here.

I thought, couldn't it just be orcas? Nope. Killer whales rip up their food instead of biting it off in one chomp. Plus, great whites have been spotted in Alaska before (gulp).

Bering Sea fisherman caught one over 40 years ago, but scientists and fisherman in the area think they could be coming up to the 𝓲𝓬𝔂 𝓷𝓸𝓻𝓽𝓱. A 2018 article says there were about 20 seal killings, and hunters reported seeing a 16-foot long shark – similar to the size of a great white.

(total watch time: 41 minutes, 46 seconds)

Remembering Ninilchik's 'Worst [Cook] in America'

Recently, a friend and I were talking about cooking shows, specifically Worst Cooks in America. It reminded me of an interview I did with Charles Oakley years back when he made a brief appearance on the Food Network show. He lived in Ninilchik and was the first contestant from his season eliminated.

I was so sad to learn Charles died in October. He was so funny in our conversation we had on the phone when I interviewed him for ADN. A couple of years later, I saw him at the Alaska State Fair and introduced myself. He remembered exactly who I was and was incredibly kind. Rest in peace, Charles.

Published January 3, 2019 in the Anchorage Daily News

Charles Oakley’s new year is off to a pretty good start. The Ninilchik local is on the newest season of Food Network’s “Worst Cooks in America," premiering this Sunday.

Oakley has lived in Alaska since the mid-'70s. He calls himself a spray can artist. You may recognize him from his live performances from the Alaska State Fair, the 3 Barons Renaissance Fair or other summer events, where he uses recycled cans of paint to create works of art.

In 2018, Oakley flew to New York City to share the culinary stage with 14 other contestants from across the country for the 15th season of “Worst Cooks.” The show first aired in 2010 and is hosted by chefs Anne Burrell and Tyler Florence. “Worst Cooks in America” takes contestants with no cooking skills through an intense cooking camp and competition. In the season finale, two finalists cook for a panel of culinary experts, and the best of the worst will win $25,000.

When asked if his cooking impressed or horrified the judges, Oakley said that he couldn’t reveal details before the episodes aired.

Oakley grew up on his family’s homestead in Ninilchik, where practically all food was hunted and gathered from the land around him, he said. He was involved in filling up the freezer but not preparing it.

“I could burn sushi,” Oakley joked.

Oakley and his wife, Melissa, are big fans of the Food Network, and “Worst Cooks” is one of their favorites shows. Oakley wanted to impress his wife and bring something new to the table, so he submitted an application to be a contestant, He got in.

Before he flew to New York, Melissa had a rule in the kitchen; Oakley had to be within arm’s reach of a fire extinguisher at all times.

“I’m serious,” said Oakley. “I’m the only one on this planet that ever had a gas fire on an electric stove. The fire department was involved.”

Oakley acquired a few tricks of the trade to take home to his family’s kitchen, but Melissa still wants the fire extinguisher nearby.

“Now, cooking is fun,” said Oakley. “I do it for entertainment now.”

While he couldn’t disclose if he won the cash and bragging rights, he did say he befriended many of his castmates and still speaks with some of them every day. When he first met the other cooks, Oakley was asked many of the stereotypical questions Alaskans hear when they visit the Lower 48, like if he lived in an igloo.

“A lot of people I met when I did the show thought we all lived like (‘Alaskan Bush People’),” Oakley said.

Oakley says his new skills allow him to provide for his children and grandchildren. He even helped cook Christmas dinner this year — liver pate and smoked ham.

“If you see any culture around the world, the biggest times that they meet together that is very meaningful is around the dinner table,” Oakley said. “To now be able to make something for my family — especially my wife, Melissa — to see that smile on her face touches my heart more than you could ever know.”

Oakley knows that if he can cook, anyone can. He encourages people just getting into the kitchen to take their time and not rush anything.

“There are a lot of cooks out there in this world that have convinced themselves that there is no hope, but there is hope,” said Oakley.