I spent my Saturday binging 6+ hours of 'Slednecks'
I have been holding off on watching Slednecks (mainly because I couldn't find it anywhere to watch for free). MTV has done a real good job of keeping this one on lock. Or maybe it was never popular enough that people were looking for it, who knows.
This week, we're following a group who live in the modern day Wild Wild West of Alaska. Wasilla – you might be familiar with it. Slednecks aired during my freshman year of college. I'm like 95% sure I met Dylan once at little get together my UAA roomie had (shoutout Ariane 🫶🏼).
There are 11 cast members on the show, and at least two have an outline of AK tattooed on them. Slednecks is from Zoo Productions, which also produced Buckwild – another one-seasoner from MTV that was released a year prior – but was canceled after one of the cast mates died.
Suzanna Caldwell covered the release in 2014 (shoutout Suzanna ✍🏻) and chatted with some of the cast.
There's a lot of wild, crazy people out here, Slednecks cast member Kelly Hill told Suzanna. I think we hold it back a little bit.
Throughout the 18 episode-run, Slednecks tries to give Jersey Shore. So much drinking and fighting (a reminder that two out of three women in Alaska have experienced domestic violence in their lives). Most of the boys are embodying Johnny Knoxville with some Jackass-esque stunts. As I binged the season from my couch from a broken leg, I winced a few times at what the self-proclaimed "fungineer" was jerry-rigging up, like a tug-o-war between an airboat and a truck. Or creating a chair launch that catapults people into the water. Etc etc.
Other activities include jumping a 50-foot road on a snowmachine, being dragged on a water tube through a swamp by a monster truck, jetskiing behind an airboat on a river and snowboarding butt-naked.
Many moons ago, back in 2015 or 16', I went to the Talkeetna railroad trestle bridge with Kathryn. People would hang and have bonfires on a beach that has been wiped out by the river. A few mutuals rode in on bikes with packs of beer, simultaneously circling and talking to us and friends. Kathryn looked at me and said, this is some hick shit right here. That's kind of what Slednecks brings to mind for me.
A joke kids would tell at my high school was that you could get "Wasyphilis" from a valley boy. I would say majority of the guys on Slednecks fall under that category of fuck boy.
When filming, Kelly and Dylan are roommates. Kelly and Sierra used to date but called it quits, and he eventually dates Samantha. Amber, Zeke, Jackie and Trevor all live together (which is messy because Amber and Zeke are hooking up). Tosca and Trevor make it official and she moves in, which ups the household headcount to five. T and T end the show engaged (somehow), but don't last.
I haven't even gotten to Hali or Big Mike. Are you confused yet?
A cast of 11 people in 20-minute episodes makes it hard to get to know everybody. All you need to know about Big Mike is that he makes his crockpot meatballs with booze and has Bad Vibes.
I didn't like how hard it was to find Mike's last name. Usually not a good sign. I discovered it was Sexton (shoutout Ari 🔎) through a 12-year-old MTV Facebook post, where he liked comments on a photo posted of him. That led me to his Court View, he had a civil protective order filed against him in March 2013. Not a good sign.
Once I knew his last name, I found this ADN story from July 2014, where a 20-year-old woman died in Lake Lucille after the canoe she was in with Mike flipped. He was 24 at the time, and they had both been drinking.
There is also so much fighting. I initially counted five, but I genuinely lost count of how many scraps cast mates had that ended in blood. Some had to get stitches, and every fight involved alcohol. There's even an episode called Girl Fight. I think it's easier to count the cast who didn't get in fights compared to those who did.
Tosca throws a bottle at Trevor's head after he calls her a cunt (I mean...). Samantha and Sierra get so scrappy an episode is named Girl Fight in their honor. Big Mike and Trevor get into it because Trevor kept calling BM "schmedium Mike." Also, continued eye roll to Indigenous food being labeled as gross by white people. I don't really care about Wasillians gagging at muktuk or moose tongue.
The majority of the cast still live in Alaska, excluding Amber and Sierra.
(total watch time: 6 hours, 40 minutes)
Malcolm in the Middle + MITM: Life's Still Unfair
I have been watching Malcolm in the Middle, it's such a nostalgic throwback for me. And, I wanted a refresh before diving into the miniseries-slash-part-two-revival that came out on April 10, Malcolm in the Middle: Life's Still Unfair, consisting of four 30-minute episodes.
It's so funny hearing Bryan Cranston get loud and flip from Hal to Walt. Also, I had no clue Jane Kaczmarek was married for so many years to the guy from Get Out that says, I would have voted for Obama a third term if I could. Jane actually shared in March that she reconnected with her high school sweetheart at their 50th reunion in 24', and got married the following year. I cry.
The child actors are great, but Jane and Bryan are really the stars of MITM (IMO). Also, I have no previous memory of the plot line involving Francis, the eldest son, quitting military school to try working at an Alaskan logging camp. He eventually meets his wife Piama there, who is Indigenous, but nobody in the writer's room took any time to learn anything about Inuit culture besides giving her that title. She mentions living on a reserve (😑). Metlakatla is the only one here.
(total watch time: 2 days, 7 hours, 22 minutes)
From my momma hehehe
If you want some snail mail, let me know a good mailing address and I'll send you an AK IRL sticker! Elizabeth designed them (shoutout E 🫂) and I think they are so fun.